Well... here I am back again on this silly internet blog instead of diligently working as I should be. Ah well, it's how it goes. At any rate... today felt like it lasted a lifetime. From the chapel service this morning through about 6pm in the evening I was pretty much a blubbery mess... went through an entire package of Kleenex, but that's what grief will do to you. I have decided this:

No matter what people say when they criticize your relationship or "lack thereof" with someone who has died--and you know that you loved them--that's all that matters. Fuck the rest of those assholes, but at the same time hug them because they're going through hell too.

Hugging Jens today was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

It was pretty much a downer of a day until Alex came over to claim his keys. He is so cute he loses them all the time and it makes me smile. I'm very grateful that he forgot them today especially though, as he is quickly becoming my rock. I like that things are different this time around... he lets me love him now, and I'm lucky for it. (Side Note: Oregon... 24 days!!!! Sooooooo excited.)

And now... I must actually be productive or I will flunk my ass out of scholarships. Eek.

Later days, hopefully less of life's bullshit and more fuzzies to come.